**UPDATED** (see below)

Sometimes I think I’m destined to be alone. A week ago, I would have felt somewhat saddened by this statement. Today, I think it’s probably better than the alternative. Here’s the deal.

Periodically, I go onto the internet in an attempt to meet someone. One of two things generally happen:

1) I meet no one, I talk to no one, I basically waste a bunch of time doing something I don’t enjoy.

2) I meet someone and he is a complete nutjob and I spend the next month screening my calls and making sure no one is hiding in the bushes near my house.


Neither scenario is all that desirable. After I’ve gotten bored/scared of the internet dating scene, I decide that I’m better in real-life and to take this show on the road to try to meet people. And I do – I’ve actually made friends with several people that I wouldn’t normally have met and now we go out and do things together. It’s great; I like friends!

Felix 2

Now here’s where it gets interesting… Since I’ve been in school, I’ve always kind of held out hope that I would meet someone through that avenue. It took a long time, but I did. Go me.

I went out on a date with this guy from class last week. We made plans to see each other two days later. The day in between, he messaged me to see what I was doing. I thought it was a bit weird, since we already had plans to meet up the next day, but I thought, well, maybe he’s eager and just wants to see me. Kinda sweet, right? I ended up talking to him later on that night and he told me what he was thinking of doing:

1) Show up at my work so we could go have dinner. Or

2) Drive around my neighbourhood and when he found out I was home, to let me know that he’s 5 minutes away and would be right over.

You know, since I like surprizes. Being that I have an “interesting” sense of humour and he said it with a chuckle, I assumed that he was kidding and just kind of laughed it off. But after hanging up with him, and thinking about the conversation more and more, I couldn’t help but think “But what if he’s not joking…….”

Felix 3

We had plans the next day to meet up around my place and I was beginning to worry that if I met up with him and he found out where I lived, I would come home one day to find him sitting on my porch. Yes. I was beginning to worry that he may start stalking me.

Felix 4

I thought, maybe I’m over-reacting (that has been known to happen once or twice before). So I called K and told her about it and asked her what she thought. She said one thing that I was also thinking “He seems needy. Like really needy. But maybe he just really likes you”. I had double-booked myself, so I decided to cancel the plans. Here’s what happened in our text convo (have I mentioned I hate text convos?):

Me: Hey – turns out my stepmom wants to play badminton, so I can’t play tennis with you. Sorry.

Him: Oh, no problem – what about dinner?

Me: Will be staying at my dad’s for dinner.

Him: Well, what about after that?

Me: Depends on what time I finish up with the folks, but I doubt it will be early enough to do anything afterwards.

Him: Oh, okay.

… … … (some time later)

Him: What time are you leaving?

Me: Soon, just gotta get cleaned up.

Him: Something really inappropriate.

Me: Shooting him down.

Him: Ha ha – I’m so creepy. Can I call you?

Me: I just got on the phone. (quickly call K)

Him: Oh. Okay.

… … … … … (some time later)

Him: Have you left yet?

(I didn’t respond, because I figured I’d left by then)

… … … … (some time later)

Him: How was the game? Are we meeting up?

Me: Still with the folks

Him: Oh. Okay.

… … … … (some time later)

Him: Are you asleep? Can I call you?

(I didn’t respond, because I figured I was asleep by then)

He also told me that when I don’t respond right away, he gets grumpy and doesn’t feel better until I reply. He has also started calling me “Babe”. He also told me that he has started liking me more and more “ever since our first beer”. Our first beer was yesterday, buddy.

Felix 5

So – it turns out that I have an innate ability to meet complete nutjobs. Period. Internet, real-life, public transit; my gift knows no bounds. Options?

1) Go for it!! Get into a relationship with someone that is completely off their rocker, who’s entire day/life revolves around me and won’t be happy/complete unless I’m there with them, reassuring them and giving them a reason to live.

2) Remain single.

Felix 6

Being single never looked so good.

**UPDATE – I’ve since told him that we want different things and that it’s not going to work. He really wants to talk about it. I really don’t. He continues to text me to tell me that he’s been thinking about me and he hopes that I’m okay. I don’t respond.

I just re-read this post and I don’t think it does justice to just how creepy this guy is. I mean, he was really, really creepy. The fact is, he had me running for the hills within 24hours of our first date. I think that’s a record… well, except for the first nutjob; he had me running in an hour. But that’s a whole other post….

Big thanks to EliseArt for providing illustrations!

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